Nothing Stays A Secret!

This weeks 100 word piece for Friday Fictioneers. Photo by Roger Bultot.

copyright-roger-bultotHis voice was barely a whisper, “Does he know you’re here?” I swallowed softly and lifted my face to touch across his cheek.  “No” was all I could manage as the heady smell of him inflamed my skin sending a thousand tiny lightning bolts pulsing beneath my flesh.

I leaned into the fire, his touch like the blaze of burning sun. These feelings like a saw cutting loose the chains around my heart. I could almost hear the chains being sliced. Hang on… that was a saw. I pushed at his chest, ran to the window and just heard the roar of the tree as it fell. “Damn”

23 thoughts on “Nothing Stays A Secret!

  1. Well done. There have been a few “tree falls on adulterous lover” tales this week. Love (or at least jealousy) must be in the air (or the blogosphere)!

    I loved “a thousand tiny lightning bolts pulsing beneath my flesh.” Also loved how the chainsaw played into the love scene…then she realized it was an actual saw!

    I would recommend two extremely minor changes/typo corrections. In the first sentence, I think you need a period after “whisper.” In the second sentence of the second paragraph, “lose” appears to be a typo (should be “loose”).

  2. There’s something almost poetic about your car being pinned down by a tree outside the place where you’re up to no good. Nice one, very sensual. I think that should be ‘you’re here’ rather than ‘your here’.

  3. I love how you used the words ‘chain’ and ‘saw’ repeatedly to build to your, ahem, climax.
    Very well done, darling.

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