Dating Santa

Please be aware this has a slight adult theme and for that I may no longer be on the nice list,  I apologise.


It has been a very long time,

But I still can’t quite forget,

The night we had together,

That night that we first met,

I’d hung my stockings neatly,

Against the fire to dry,

You’d eyed them so discreetly,

Though I’m sure I heard you sigh,

I saw you in that outfit,

So big and red and round,

And I knew I’d pay a forfeit,

If I made the slightest sound,

You wove a trail of magic,

That had me in your spell,

And I saw the stretch of fabric,

As I watched your big bag swell,

I’m not the type of woman,

Who throws herself at men,

But I felt my boundaries loosen,

When I saw your fountain pen.

You asked me was I naughty,

And I said “Oh no, I’m nice”

You looked at me quite haughty,

And said you’d check it twice.

You gave me such a present,

Against the prickly green,

That the needles fell in torment,

And the fairy’s not been seen.

So this year I’ll be waiting,

For the big man in the suit,

For when you’re dating Santa,

The naughty list is mute.

18 thoughts on “Dating Santa

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